Wednesday, April 17, 2019

Perspective is everything ....

Almost 90 days ago, I agreed to participate in a challenge at my gym Ora Fitness and Yoga. When I agreed to do this challenge, I thought it would be good for me, physically, to mix things up. I reluctantly agreed to the conditions of the challenge that would have me leave the comfort of the gym and enter the unknown rooms of yoga and spin.

I have always tried to be active, and I had joined Ora during the previous year while on mat leave. What I didn't expect from this challenge was the profound mental shift that has occurred these last 12 weeks.  I have always tried to see things differently (hence the name of this blog), but this challenge pushed me to stretch myself even further.

When I first "dipped my toes"into the yoga studio I was leary, even hesitant, about the power of this room. I had heard about the physical benefits of the infrared, but I was going to do just my 1 class/week to satisfy requirements of the challenge - and my fully commit and trust the process.  Little did I know how much that first heart-core class with TracyLynn would impact me. I left that class feeling physically challenged, but I also felt that she spoke directly to my heart. I had never experienced someone who was able to speak directly to my soul - it was a feeling I would soon start to crave - a void that needed to be filled was finally being filled. I was starting to heal from the inside, as cliche as that sounds.  Wounds that I didn't know existed (ok, I knew they were there, but I was ignoring them) were starting to be healed. A power that I had inside me was starting to be awoken. I knew I had to return the following week and try that class again.

3 weeks into the challenge a shift had happened inside of me; I was no longer " happy" in the gym.  I liked the  challenges that the new classes in the yoga studio brought. Cardio has never been my forte, and now doing it a heated that's a challenge!!

While I was enjoying these classes, there was still a piece of my puzzle missing...enter Soulidifly! This is a class that a year ago I would have laughed at, but now its a class that I am missing immensely (get better soon TL!). Over the years I have built up many walls in my life - self preservation is key! This class finally allowed me to slow down enough to actually break through some of my walls. My first class I left not knowing what I had experienced, but knowing that I needed more of it in my life. Having fed myself negative self talk for so many years, I NEEDED to hear the messages given in this class. I am good enough, I am strong enough, I am worth it and I love myself! These are messages that I desperately needed to hear....and add to my own self talk daily. I HAVE been through harder and survived! I am a fighter! Slowing down and noticing the beautiful things around me has really changed my perspective on many things.

Things I have learned over the past 12 weeks:

1) I am a force to be reckoned with - a few people have commented that I am a leader and people look up to me and what I am doing. People have commented that they heard me talk about a class, and tried it because they value my opinion. I have never felt that way about myself, but I am owning it!

2)  Being selfish isn't selfish, its self love - As a parent, being away from your child is often considered selfish. I am done work at 2:45, and could get my children by 3:00, but Im selfish and go to the gym first. I work a busy job and I need time to decompress after work. This makes me a better parent when I do get my children. I am present, healthy and setting a good example of physical/mental health for them.

3) When you slow down and take the time to be present, the world is amazing! Over the past several weeks, I have done random acts of kindness, but I have also been on the receiving end of them. In the past, I wouldn't have either recognised it or taken the time to acknowledge them. Slowing down, being grateful and showing appreciation are important.

4) The world works in mysterious ways and people come into your life for a reason, when you need them. Being open to see them, greet them and accept them is key.

5) It ok to not be in control - as a type A teacher, I am used to having a lot of say over how things go in my day to day life. The truth is, not having this control scares me. I like routine. I like predicable.  I like knowing the plan! There are things in life that we cant control...and when those things come up, I need to remember that its ok and that I do have control over how I react to them.

6)  Its ok to be vulnerable - life is tough and its ok to ask for help, have a bad day and cry. I have done all of these things recently and have come back stronger. Being emotional isn't a weakness, its a strength.

7) Slowing down is important - the stretch class, meditation class, 5 minutes at the end of class are JUST as important (if not more) than the high intensity class. Our days are so busy, and sometimes our bodies just need to rest. The most changes happen in recovery.

8) My inside has changed more than my outside - I wish there was a way to measure the health of our insides as I feel they have healed so much over the last 12 weeks. I cant explain this one well, but I feel like my joints, muscles, organs and skin just feel healthier.

9) My physical body is amazing and I dont give it enough credit! While I may not have had the inches/pounds lost that I would have liked, I feel so much better physically. I need to remember to thank my body for all it does for me daily and all that it has done for me. I push myself in every class I attend, and my body accepts that push!

I have also had  2 very extremely high risk, difficult pregnancies and 2 traumatic deliveries (not just the c-section, but the circumstances that required them happen) and my body was still able to bounce back in ways I am in awe of. My body grown 2 amazing children, has protected them both during pregnancy and delivery, and  has nourished them - and for that I am eternally grateful. Things easily could have gone more sideways, and 1 or more of us could have easily not made it out the other side. All 3 of us not only are surviving, we are thriving and doing things that other people might see as amazing! Its just normal for us! I am learning to thank my body for all it has done, rather than be upset about the things it is still working towards.

 This challenge was great for pushing me out of my comfort zone, making me balance my workouts more and stretch myself emotionally. This is not the end for me, this is the end of this chapter and I cant wait to write the next one....with some more kick ass classes! As I said to Emily tonight, this is just 90 out of the my life, Im here for the long haul....

Sunday, March 10, 2019

Challenge accepted....

As some of you may know, I am part of a 90 day challenge at my gym. This started on January 21, so we are now well into the challenge. I joined this challenge because I wanted some more accountability, I go to the gym very regularly, but I will admit that recently I have been "phoning it in". This challenge seemed to be something that would push me out of my comfort zone, but seemed doable to me .... I don't like to fail. I set my goals (Body - intermittent fast 16:8x5 days/week. Mind - trust the process and commit to the full 90 days. Soul - spend 10 minutes each day with each of my kids) and started on my way.

There were 2 options for the challenge, and I chose "Train Your Body" - which among other things required me to do 1 class in the yoga studio and one class in the spin room on top of 1 class in the gym each week. I will admit there was a lot of whining on my part, sorry Keashia, when this part of the challenge was announced. I LOVE my gym workouts and I was being FORCED out of the gym 2 days/week! How dare they!! Little did I know that the classes that were added to the yoga studio at 3:30 would be the best things that ever happened to me, and Keashia in the spin room - what an awesome gift!

Before the challenge "officially" started, I found myself in a 9:15 Sunday am heart-core class with TracyLynn. I had no idea at the time, how much this decision to attend this class would set in place a cascade of events in my life. If you haven't been to a class with Tracylynn, you are truly missing out.

Before this class, I always thought that going to the gym was solely to train my body, I never realized just how much I was neglecting my mental health. I had been avoiding dealing with this aspect of my health for a long time and didn't realize how much this was actually limiting limiting my physical progress. My ship was sinking and I needed to take back being the captain of my ship - I have the power to not let others effect me in a negative way.

2 weeks into the challenge, I stopped Keashia  in the hallways and I told her I had come to a conclusion that I never thought I would ever come to .....I prefer not to workout  in the gym. I came to Ora because I missed lifting heavy things, but this challenge has made me realize that what I have been doing for over a year isn't helping me to reach the goals I want to achieve. 2 weeks ago I was annoyed that I had to leave the gym, and now I'm finding that I have to find a place in my workout schedule to go to the fitness studio. This was a shift I never saw coming!

After meeting with Dr. Gibons, the Naturopath at Restore,  I gained some insight as to why this is - my system was overloaded by stimulus. Work is hectic, home is hectic and the gym is hectic. The yoga studio and spin rooms provide a environment of calm and focus that allow my mind and body to slow down, but also allow me to challenge my body in a different way. 

It was around this time I decided to take a huge step for me....I walked into a Soulidify class. This was such a new experience for me, but one that I am so thankful that I took. The lessons I took away from that hour have had a profound impact on my mindset. This was the missing piece of my puzzle!  For so many years, my self talk has been negative, and being in the yoga studio and hearing positive messaging and permission to let go of things was huge for me.  I cried in that class - for the first time in a long time, I was given permission to let go of the past, forgive myself for things that I have been holding onto, believe in myself and know that who I am is good enough! Somehow having someone else tell me its ok is easier, but I am learning to believe my own thoughts.

I was given gifts, and even though others may not understand them, I do! Often, especially at work, I wonder why people don't see things the way I do. I now understand that's why I'm in the job that I am in - I see things differently and  therefore can help kids differently. My blog is called "the way I see it" because often I have felt that I see things differently, and that its viewed negatively (mostly by me), but I'm learning to embrace its and see it as a gift, not a hindrance.

Half way through this challenge, I am not the same person who began it! I am accepting who I am - my flaws, my strength and my gifts. I am learning to see myself in a different light, through the lens that others see me. I have given myself permission to let go of past, forgive myself and to accept that its a process that cant be rushed. Change takes time, and even if I cant see it...I'm changing. The last 2 years have been a HUGE challenge for myself and my family; and I'm finally in a place where I can heal and I am so thankful to have a safe place to become the best version of myself.

For the first time in a long time I feel like me! I am making positive physical and mental changes and I cant wait to see what the next 45 days brings!

Saturday, June 14, 2014

I feel sad :(

I have had part of this as my status in Facebook his week, but I felt like I needed to expand on things. 

I feel sad for all my colleagues who are going through such a tough time right now. June is always a tough month, but add moving the last day up by 2 weeks and not being able to properly celebrate all the achievements of their students is heartbreaking. As a kindergarten teacher, these students have grown the most (in my opinion) in the past 10 months and deserve to be celebrated. This year though, no year end videos recapping the year and chuckling at how "small" we were in September and no happy hugs saying way to go and good luck in grade 1. This year my colleagues are scrambling to get scrap books done and "goodbyes" said as the school year came to an abrupt end. But has it? There is still hope that we might get to spend a few more days with these little people who have become such a big part of our lives in the 10 months we spend with them. These special moments have been taken away by the gov't who has locked teachers out of their classrooms and not "allowed" teachers to do these extra special things for their students. 

Teachers work countless hours above and beyond what people see in the 4 walls of a classroom. I feel sad that many people don't understand this and  think that all the strike is about is a raise. If it was just about a raise, we wouldn't spend thousands of our own dollars on making our classrooms loving and inviting places and creating memorable activities for learning. People "assume" that everything in the classrooms has been provided by the school district, but in reality, most classrooms come with tables and chairs and some manipulative that are shared school wide. It is up to the teacher to do the rest - wall decorations, books, games, supplies for special projects and much more. I personally have spent upwards of $7500 on personal items for my classroom since I started teaching. 

I feel sad that teachers are not appreciated by the general public. Everyone at one point in their life has been effected by a teacher. We work hard and deserve to have working conditions where we can properly educate every student and have a wage that doesn't require a second job to make ends meet.

I feel sad for all the students who every day go into classes that are over crowded and under supported. Every child deserves to have the best education possible! The "average" child deserves to have as much time spent with them as the "difficult" child, however the reality of the classroom today doesn't allow for that. This is what makes me the most sad. These children will never have the fully funded, fully supported education they deserve and in 15 years when they are joining the workforce, people will be baffled by the lack of basic skills missing from these employees.

I feel sad that my 8 month old might not have a proper education waiting for her in 5 years. The way the school system is going, who knows what will be in place when she walks into her kindergarten classroom. Will she have a teacher who cares about her and her education or person who is just there to work 8:25-2:45 and not do anything above and beyond because they are so burned out from years of supplementing the system?

I feel sad for my colleagues who are retiring or moving on to a new school as this year has been a stressful one! A proper farewell may or may not happen. School communities are like families and when someone leaves it's tough, but not be be able to properly sad goodbye sucks! I know at my school, we have 2 amazing teachers retiring after 30+ years of AMAZING service and they are not getting the recognition and farewell they deserve. We are also saying goodbye to our fantastic principal and at least 6 teachers who have all left their mark on the school. We might be losing more, but since the second round of jobs haven't closed yet, these teachers may get no closure at all. How sad after being part of such a special community, both inside and outside the school.

This is a sad time for public education and people need to stand up for their child, niece/nephew, cousin or grandchild because EVERY child deserves to have a teacher who cares and is able to meet their needs while earning a wage that reflects the cost of living. "Families first" means a properly funded education system with proper supports for ALL students, not just the ones who attend private schools (which are partially funded by the taxpayers). 

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Homework completed...just in time for the break!

I was given an assignment to complete by friend and colleague, Antonio Vendramin. It has taken me several days to get to this as I have a 10 week old at home. 
Here are 11 random facts about me:

1) I was born in Cape Town and moved to Vancouver in 1980. 

2)  My niece was the first person in my family born in Canada. 

3) I have a love/hate relationship with my birthday. Being born on Dec 26 sucks, but people remember it! 

4) I was 1 of 3 people born on Dec 26 in my family. Unfortunately, my grandfather and uncle are not longer around to share birthdays with me. 

5) The day my daughter was born was both the best and worst day of my life. Read my blog post to find out why. 

6) After high school I went to university to be a high school PE teacher. Boy was I wrong about where I would end up! 

7) In 1988 I was the provincial champion for vault in my age group. 

8) My husband and I went to elementary and high school together, but in separate grades. 

9) I played the trumpet through high school. 

10) I hate public speaking, ironic as that's what I do all day. 5 year olds are very forgiving! 

11) In 1990, my gymnastics career ended because I broke my big toe into 50+ pieces. 

Questions from Antonio:

1. Favourite place you have visited? Venice, Italy. I stayed in campsite across from Venice which we had to take a water taxi to/from and one morning I woke up early to watch the sunrise over Venice. 
2. Favourite sports team? NHL - Canucks. MLS - Whitecaps. NFL - Chargers 
3. Five songs on your device/CD in my car… right now I currently have a Charlotte Diamond CD in my car (and yes I know ALL words!)
4. Biggest surprise of your life? Finding out I was pregnant after a year of trying. We found out three days after seeing a fertility doctor and the day after I booked my flight to Israel. 
5. What would your best friend say they like MOST about you? I am dependable and will always be there to what ever they need. 
6. Nickname? Current or past. Munchkin 
7. Favourite number?  Why is that number significant? I like the #7, there is no real significance. My new house address is 14721 - all multiples of 7, so I am happy! 
8. What drives you crazy? People being late
9. Biggest fear? Anything with snakes and spiders
10. Favourite movie? ...Finding Nemo...
11. If you could do anything other than what you are currently doing career-wise, what would it be? I would love to be a CSI.

Now its your turn:

Gallit Zvi 
Michelle Hiebert
Dave Beaudry
Jennifer Paszkat 
Laura Murtsell 
Hugh McDonald
Liane Loeppky 
Holly Dickinson 
Lilliana Bolton 
Erika Gray 

Questions for you: 

1) If you could live anywhere else in the world, where would it be and why?
2) What is your biggest regret?
3) If you could change one thing about yourself physically what would it be?
4) What is your favourite colour and why?
5) Favourite food?
6) What is your best childhood memory?
7) What is the weirdest animal you have held/touched?
8) Where is the furthest place from home you have traveled?
9) Most recent book you have read is?
10) What are you most proud of in your adult life?
11) What is 1 thing on your bucket list?

Here’s how it works:
  1. Acknowledge the nominating blogger.
  2. Share 11 random facts about yourself.
  3. Answer the 11 questions the nominating blogger has created for you.
  4. List 11 bloggers.
  5. Post 11 questions for the bloggers you nominate to answer, and let all the bloggers know they have been nominated. Don’t nominate a blogger who has nominated you.

Post back here with a link after you write this. Go on, you have homework to do.

Monday, October 21, 2013

When thank you is not enough...

This is going to be long, and I apologize in advance. It has also taken me several days (ok almost 2 weeks) to write as my time has been limited.

This year Thanksgiving holds a very different meaning for me! The last 2 weeks if my life have been a whirlwind, and I am so thankful to be on the other side, but it couldn't have happened without some truly amazing people in my life, but my husband Daniel in particular.

Daniel and I were expecting our first child to arrive near the end of October and we were crazy enough to think that buying a new house and moving in Sept was 29 was a good idea! There were some bumps along the way with the house purchase, at one point we were going to move into the basement suite for a month, but somehow it all worked out. The owner of the house found a place, and we moved in Sept 29. Now came the task of setting up a new house. Being 9 months pregnant, everyone would "yell" at me when I picked up a box. I'm not one to sit around and watch, but I had to learn how to accept help. My parents, Daniel's dad, my brother, Daniel and I managed to get a lot unpacked before calling it a night. Thankful for helpful family members.

The next week brought MANY appointments for me! Being a high risk pregnancy, I was being followed VERY closely. Monday I saw my OB, Tuesday I had fetal monitoring and an ultrasound and Wednesday I  had a consult with an anesthesiologist (which is standard if you have asthma). All these appointments went perfectly well and everything was great with me and baby...until that night! Early in the morning I woke up with really itchy hands and the soles of my feet. I have never been that itchy before. When I look at my lower legs now, I can still see the scratches and bruises from when I was seeking relief from this itch. In the morning I had to deal with the alarm company (a saga I wont bore you with the details, but it was a 2 day ordeal) and I tried to make an appointment with my Dr or OB about my feet. My Dr was at a conference and the OB said to deal with my off to a clinic I went armed with some info from Dr. Google. After waiting for almost an hour and half, the Dr had no idea and basically told me to come back tomorrow if it was still itchy and no mention for what Dr. Google said. Hind sight is 20/20 and I should have asked about my hunch, but instead I went home to suffer through another itchy night. Friday I was back at a different clinic and this DR did have the same hunch that I did and ordered the blood work needed to confirm the condition, but it was so late in the day, it had to wait until Saturday. First thing Saturday morning I was off to the lab and feeling like we were on a good path.

Daniel decided that Saturday was a good day to begin painting the baby's room, so he spent most of the day working on that project while I rested and and did some small projects around the new house with the help of his mom and dad.

Sunday morning I woke up and just wasn't feeling right. Baby was normally very active before I ate breakfast and Sunday morning I didn't feel much movement. I didn't think too much of it at the time. After breakfast when I still hadn't felt much movement, I started to be on alert. Throughout the day, I just wasn't feeling well, so I spent most of the day on the couch resting while Daniel was hard at work finishing off the paint in baby's room. I tried to do a kick count (6 movements in 2 hours), but I was so tired, I would fall asleep. Again, hind sight is 20/20 and we should have gone to the hospital then. Around 1:30, I went upstairs to talk to Daniel about getting ready to go to the soccer game. (We are BIG Whitecaps fans and they were playing a huge game against Portland that night.) We were sitting on the floor of the just finished baby's room when Daniel looked at feet and told me that we needed to go to the hospital. My feet had turned a weird brown/purple colour. Me being stubborn, told him we could go after the game, but luckily he insisted that we go before hand. So I made a quick call to triage at the hospital to let them know were were coming and I could tell that the nurse on the other end had concerns. We got ready to go in our 'Caps gear, hoping that a quick trip for fetal monitoring was all that would be needed and we could head to the game after. Boy were we wrong!!!

We got to the hospital around 2:30 and I was hooked up to a fetal monitor. I mentioned to the nurse that I had done blood work the previous day and that there were somethings that were slightly off. Daniel mentioned about my itchy and purple feet, but the nurse didn't think it was a big deal.  Baby had a strong heart rate of around 140, but I was still not feeling many movements. In the hour and a half before the Dr. came, I think I felt maybe 3 movements. The nurses kept coming and checking to make sure I wasn't feeling movements and they kept changing my position to see if we could get more movements, but nothing seemed to help. The heart rate was staying pretty steady, not the usually accelerations and decelerations that you get when baby is moving. Having done weekly fetal monitoring for 5 weeks, I learned a lot about what they are looking for in a healthy baby.

Around 4:30, the Dr. came to check on us. He was concerned that there was a baby with a good heart rate, but a mom that wasn't feeling many movements. The tried some things to stimulate the baby, but nothing helped with the movements or a spike in heart rate from one. He decided to do an ultrasound to see if maybe I wasn't feeling movement, even though movement was there. His theory was that maybe the placenta had moved and was acting like a cushion. During the ultrasound, the Dr, resident and nurse didn't say much, but I could tell by the look on their faces that they were concerned. At this point it was decided that they were going to try to induce 3 contractions in 10 minutes to see if baby responds, and I was admitted. A nurse came over and told me that they needed to plan for a c-section "just in case" and to remove all my jewelry and sign a few more forms.

Around 5:35 we were admitted and taken to our room. I told Daniel that it was going to be a while and that he should probably put more money in the meter and go and get himself some food as he had not eaten since breakfast. Once he left I asked the nurse started explaining what was going to happen and then all of a sudden she says "No, we are doing this now!" Scariest 6 words of my life! Next thing I know, codes are being called and nurses and doctors are being paged and I have an oxygen mask on. The nurse lifted the oxygen mask long enough to give her Daniel's phone number to tell him to get back up to the room ASAP! The next few minutes are a blur, but I do remember nurses and doctors running down the halls to meet us, Daniel running behind the bed and me lying on the bed crying because no one was telling us what was happening. I knew that we were headed to OR 8 as that was repeated over and over in the pages being called, but beyond that...I knew nothing. I knew Daniel had made it up but I couldn't see him.

We race into the OR and arrived there at 5:50 and there is a team of about 15 waiting for us. As soon we we arrive, they start working on me. In my panicked state, I did manage to hear someone ask  if they wanted me sitting or lying and when the answer was lying, I knew that this was no ordinary c-section. I was going to be put under general anesthetic. There was one nurse who held my hand and wiped my tears and I asked her to confirm that I was having a general anesthetic and she said yes. Next thing I knew there was a screen up by my face and I could feel people working behind the curtain to prep me for surgery. Last thing I remember was a mask going over my face.

I know how scared I was being wheeled into the OR, I cant even begin to imagine what Daniel was feeling. He was told to gown up and that they would try to get him in, but no one cam back to get him. Neither of us got to say "I love you" before the OR doors closed, he had no idea what was going on - the last he heard was a nurse telling him to drop everything and get back to the room ASAP! The next 15 minutes must have been the scariest of his life not know what was happening with his wife and child. Phone calls were made to both his parents and my parents. Not only to tell them what was happening, but also to provide Daniel with the support he needed. At 6:05 our beautiful daughter entered the world and a nurse finally came out to tell Daniel that "It's a girl and she came out screaming".

Daniel and Ayla were taken back to the room, and I was sutured up and sent to recovery where I would remain for the next 3 hours. I think the weirdest part for me was waking in recovery. I opened my eyes and asked the nurse the following 2 questions before I fell asleep again 1) Is my baby ok? 2) What did I have? Having not found out the gender ahead of time, I was actually one of the last among the family to know that we had a beautiful daughter, Ayla, who weighed in at 5 lbs 9.7 oz and was 18 inches long.

Back in the room, Daniel and Ayla had 3 hours to bond before I got to join them. A Dr (or nurse, I am not sure who) had come to talk to Daniel about what had happened. They will not know exactly what happened until the placenta comes back from pathology, but when they opened me up, there was meconium in the amniotic fluid. I believe this is hat was causing all my itching as my body was try to deal with the toxins. The blood work that I had done the day before showed that I was negative for the syndrome the Dr believed I had (cholestasis) as my numbers were slightly low and if it was cholestasis the numbers would have been sky high. There was also blood in the amniotic fluid which the Dr's believe is either from a placental abruption or the placenta pulling away from the uterine wall.

Seeing my daughter for the first time was such an overwhelming experience. After everything we had been through in the past 4 hours, just to hold her was AMAZING!! I think I cried, tears of joy, for at least 20 minutes when I got back up to the room. There were no words needed, just hugs and kisses.

It really didn't hit me how desperate the situation was until I started to process what happened. The first few people I called when I got back in the room were probably just as shocked as I was that she was here! The next few days I did a lot of reflecting, trying to process what had actually happened and deal with the guilt inside me. The truth is, Ayla is lucky to be here and be healthy! This hit me several times, including 2 days after her birth when I was alone with Ayla. Daniel had gone back to the house to set up furniture and unpack boxes. Ayla was lying on my chest sleeping and holding my thumb tightly. I was apologizing to her for not protecting her and promising that it would never happen again. She kept squeezing my thumb as if to say, its ok. For about 30 minutes she help my thumb tightly and even if I tried to pull it away, she wouldn't let me. The other time the reality of the situation hit me hard was early one morning as I was having a conversation with Meg Unger about her son (who was just diagnosed as cancer free) and I typed the words "I get it, my daughter almost died" that the enormity of the situation really hit me. Even as I type this 2 weeks later, I have tears streaming down my face, because I didn't do my job as a mother. It is my job to protect her, and I wrote off things to being so busy with move and not feeling well.

I have replayed the events of that week and day on my head so many times and looking back on it now, I would have done so many things differently. I should have called the hospital on Thursday when my feet and hands were itchy to the point that I was leaving bruises and scratched and the clinic didn't know why.  We should have gone in Sunday morning after breakfast when I wasn't feeling well and she wasn't moving much. Instead, being stubborn, I told Daniel "it's not a big deal, we can go after the soccer."  I didn't want to be one of those moms who calls the hospital for every little thing. Now I know, you have to. If something doesn't feel right, it probably isn't. As my Dr told me "things change in OB so quickly."

I am so fortunate that everything worked out, and I am thankful that there were people/events along the way that saved my daughter. As much as I wanted to deliver at Woman's, being at Surrey was amazing. I had to be there because of the NICU. Luckily, we never had to use it! Surrey also has the staff on site to handle emergencies like ours, again so thankful!

The staff at SMH were incredible, especially nurse Aly who literally saved her life. Aly was monitoring her and she was the nurse who called the code that started the chain of events. Aly was calm, efficient and knew exactly was needed to be done. Unfortunately, Aly wasn't back before we were discharged, so I never got to thank her in person. I asked the other nurses to pass on my thanks to her. When we get the birth announcements, I will take one to her with a bag of Lifesavers (thanks Meg for the idea), as that is what she is.
Proud Dad making phone calls
The biggest thank you of all has to go to Daniel! He is my rock and luckily he doesn't let me get away with any BS. If it was up to me, we may have been at the soccer (which is ironic because he is a HUGE fan and the reason we have season tickets), but he took one look at my feet at made me go in. I can be a little stubborn (ok, a lot stubborn, I am a Capricorn after all) but he is the one person who knows how to get through to me. I guess that is why I married him, we balance each other out. While he is reluctant to admit it, he is the REAL reason Ayla is here and healthy and for that there are not enough thank yous. I have always knows that he is an amazing person and husband, but he truly is the best father! When I watch him and her together, it is wonderfully special bond that they have and I am fortunate to have them both in my life.

Friday, July 19, 2013


As I am not a bragger, I am going to let this picture do the talking ....

16 weeks pregnant at the Sea of Galilee, Israel. 
 P.S. No humans were harmed in the taking of this photo!

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Confession....I am a sleepy head!!

I must confess that there have been many possible posts that I could have written for this "confession" challenge. In fact, in my head I had written a posts titled "My secret addiction to stress" and "As much as I hate to admit it, I am my mother's daughter". Both of those post are a lot more "serious" and I want to keep my summer blogging light and fun (as long as @happycampergirl keeps giving us fun topics for this years Kinderblog challenge). is my confession, I AM a napper!! There is nothing I LOVE more than coming home after school or on the weekend and lying on the couch for a nap! There is something so refreshing about taking a 30-60 minute power nap in the afternoon, I just cant explain it! I have been know to plan my days around naps, I schedule evening activities (such as gym workouts) for later in the day so I can sneak in a nap.And I am not ashamed to admit this!

As a full day Kindergarten teacher, people often ask me if my kids get a nap time. Ironically, the answer is no! I know that lots of teachers do have a designated "quiet" or "rest" time in their class, but it has never worked for me (mostly because I worry that I may fall asleep). Having said that, we do have"silent" reading time after lunch and I do tend to make my afternoon activities less strenuous than the morning ones and in 3 years of teaching full day K, not 1 child has asked for a nap.

People assume this napping thing is new because "you are pregnant, its ok to nap", but when I tell them its not new, they seem shocked. I tell people I have been napping in the afternoon for years, pregnancy has just made it "OK" in people minds. The other confession I have is that I hope my child is a good napper, because I don't see me giving up my afternoon nap any time soon! 

And yes, I live with 2 cats who do this often!!!!